Recently my cousin Debrah posted some memories of her grandparents, Julius Goldfarb and Ida Hecht, on Facebook. I was so touched by what she wrote that I asked if I could share it on my blog, and she happily agreed. Julius Goldfarb was my grandmother Gussie Brotman Goldschlager’s first cousin. His mother Sarah Brod was the older sister of my great-grandmother Bessie Brod. Ida Hecht, Debrah’s grandmother, was my mother’s first cousin; her mother Taube Brotman was my grandmother’s half-sister.

Here are Debrah’s touching childhood memories of Julius and Ida:

I spent every summer until I was 10 at my grandmother‘s cottage in Long Beach Long Island. It was a small cottage, had a small front yard with a white fence and a glider. The back of the house had a dense wall of honeysuckle and a hose to wash your feet so no sand got into the house. It’s where I learned how to suck on a honeysuckle blossom.

The address was 25 New Hampshire Ave. It was a block from the beach and in that small house my grandmother had room for three of her daughters and their children and on weekends their husbands. And her husband, my grandfather, would come down on weekends also. It was a zoo.

I was blessed to have this. I thought it was the norm, and as I grew up, I strived to give this to my children, but I was unable to; life got too complicated.

My grandmother Ida was feisty, fierce, independent, tough, and beautiful. She had purchased the cottage on her own without my grandfather‘s aid or permission, which was unheard of at that time. It was her domain and we were all allowed in.

My grandmother died the spring I was 11 years old and that was the end of Long Beach. But not the end of my obsession with the beach, I still love it.

My grandfather and his four daughters opted not to keep the cottage, and it was sold. I have had occasion to drive past it, and it’s completely different. It’s been remodeled. It lives on in my memory vividly, as do my grandmother and my grandfather.

My grandfather Julius was a character. He was a true curmudgeon. He used to say four daughters is no laughing matter in Yiddish. I think he was perpetually offended that he had never had a son. He used to stick his knee in my back and pull my shoulders back when he didn’t like my posture.

I once gave him a gift. I must’ve been 12. It was in a small box, and he said so small. I said grandpa good things come in small packages to which he replied so does poison. His favorite expression was ah Kayelya which in Yiddish means Oh cholera. He said he was going to teach me how to swim, walked me down to the waters edge, grabbed my hands, and swung me in–I was 5.

I believe there was love between my grandparents. They were distant cousins. My grandmother was American born. My grandfather was born in Polish Austria. But it was a contentious marriage. A lot of bickering went on.

Still those memories frozen in time, I hold them together.

Julius Goldfarb and Ida Hecht at their wedding in 1913
Courtesy of the family

Julius and Ida Goldfarb at their granddaughter Sue’s wedding in 1959 Courtesy of the family